Sunday, January 19, 2014

Welcome to 2014

Hello blog.

Long time no see, feeling a bit down recently.

Just feel like writing some nonsense that I cant say out.
cos i dont think anyone is interested to listen as well

Thinking through about my life now..
What do I want to do?

unknowingly. boom. its another year alr.
desperately waiting to finish my studies.
after all, im studying for the sake of it.
not because i like or want it.

so this is making me really unhappy.
and the ones motivating me to school is the people.
my friends. but situation does not always allow me to spend more time w them.
always different modules or groupings. sigh.

at work as well, the ones keeping me happy at work are also the people.
my colleagues cum friends. now one by one they are starting to leave.
makes me wonder if i should start thinking about changing jobs too?

Major changes to my life are usually not because of me..
but the people around me.

im always just there, waiting for things to come or happen.
lol thats a bad thing i know.

One should always have a goal, and work towards the goal.

I dont know why I have none.
So not motivated to do stuffs.

I miss dance. but im feeling too old for SDZ lol.
I wanna learn dancing outside but ill usually take the first step only when i have company.

Its always nice to have someone to do the things you like together.
when you are happy, its happiness x 2.

Sometimes i really wish I can stay in a fantasy world.
like drama, just watching what happens and the end.

Now, every step and word i say can cause an impact to my life.

==

oh well, enough of the negative stuffs.

its a new year to begin with.
everyting is pretty much the same.

Im happy cause my 7seven-x sisters,
most of them haf graduated and are working alr.
somehow because of this, we are meeting up more frequently.

well, you do know im not the kind to initiate meetups, so ya.
haha, we even have plans to meet monthly for k sessions.
i like. haha.

they are the group of ppl who i sometimes do get really angry at,
yet can just scold them and say them hahahaa,
but dont know why when you see them, den okay alr.
and because they dont hide things from me,
im also not afraid to speak my mind in front of them.
as nonsense as i can be.

speaking of this, i really dont like when a close fren doesnt tell me things.
feels hurt- its like when i ask what heppen, why, or wat thing i missed out.
i usually hear aiya i dont know one la, or nvm over alr etc etc.
just feels like im not impt enough to know, to be part of it.
or sadly, yes, you dont treat me as a close fren, since we dont see each other often.

or maybe im just thinking too much, trying too hard.
so ive also learnt to let go, forget it.

Make yourself happy - i tell myself.

what's meant to be, will be.
I should count the happy things that i do everyday.

last year, i did went back to dance!
joined waves and had a really awesome item with the alumnis!!
doing chinese dance- i realised it is totally my style.
haha even after doing modern contemporary for past 7 years.
i still think i suit chinese dance. sadly. lolololol.
it was a hard time, but i always enjoyed new challenges.
work decided to bomb me with high workload and shortage of ppl.
i have classes and tests on the practice and performance days.
but i did it, and this kind of achievement always keep me alive.
not sure if i still wanna join next year - final year to degreeee.
shall see how..

I'm also aiming to spend more time with my family.
went for a trip to hongkong last yr, last month to be exact. haa
and i realised how much my parents have aged :(
i also want to spend more time with my ahma and ahgong.

it might be good that im not dancing at the moment.
i've been pretty selfish these years doing my own things
dance. school. friends. and not allocating time for family.
and pretty bad to myself for always trying to live up to ppl's expectations.
making myself always trying to take up more challenges. to do better.
so that i dont get negative comments from ppl.
but i still get them anyway. so what for try so hard? lol.

Lastly Im really grateful for this awesome boyfriend.
who volunteered to enter my world and made everything better
listening to all my nonsense and ridiculous questions and thoughts
even when i had really low self confidence, have doubts about myself,
you stayed with me and made me feel that im the best thing that ever happened to you.
Thank you love ~

oh dont get too happy and ask me for diamond ring hor LOL

x

and thank you blog.
i feel better now.

oh did i mention i cut short my hair too!
shortest i ever had these past 10+ years.
its a nice feeling and i feel like keeping it at this length!
feel like dyeing it too. HAA

after all, YOLO.

and with that, i shall end here, BYE

Labels: randomies, rants, thoughts

1:36 PM - 0 comments

Tuesday, January 03, 2012

Happy 2012

alright!

after the long update. now let me just recap my year 2011!

full time working.
started part time degree.
still dancing.
attached.

everything feels in place, except i need more time!
haha time is always my limiting factor.
feel that the one im neglecting is actually my family.. =(

tidied the room, thrown several old childhood toys/stuffs away.
now that i'm 21, i should start planning my new phase of life.
time to grow up, cherie!

i should continue to have fun, go out, enjoy more.
even tho nowadays, i just feel like staying at home!
getting lazier and lazier.. or forever lazy. HAHA

new year resolutions for 2012?

haha actually, i realised i nv really set any every year.
for now, study hard! to complete my degree first! 3+ years to go~
and of course, every girl would say LOSE WEIGHT, but mine would be to MAINTAIN =)

and i'm still thinking whether to continue dancing after waves16.
waves 17 will be in nov2012 @ kallang theatre, tempting but..
i'll see how when the time comes!

back to reality tmr.
see ya blog, perhaps months later~ LOL

Labels: randomies, thoughts

12:40 AM - 0 comments

Sunday, July 03, 2011

June 11

Say HELLO to this cutie! my companion at work! LOL

i missed updating the month of june.
its alr july.. half a year gone..
how fast time flies.

Month of may as usual
mainly school plus work and very little dance.
i should be gaining weight very soon! OHNO lol.

celebrated mutton's belated birthday. on 28th may i think LOL

and did a really birthday song video for our queen jessica!
at some entrance of the mrt station.. LOLLL
oh well, when we're together in full force, nothing stops us!!

then month of june.

TRDO finals!


its a nice feeling to be sitting in SPCC watching others to perform
instead of me doing otherwise since the last 4 years.
altho its a pity i wasnt able to join that competition! awww.
nevertheless, im so so super proud of my juniors!
so happy to see them that day =D


Jun 12 - a random sunday out wif my bro for pastamania.

then you know what, i cant rmb what happened in the mid of june..
oh wait, i rmbed, I WATCHED LOTS OF MOVIES.


freshness burger + kungfu panda!! on jun 3
i think its the best cartoon movie for now. ITS SO FUNNY!!

another is during after class on jun 17.

jeee soh me, buying separate seats for Popper's penguin.
i was so "lucky" to get the corner seat, i bet the person beside me must be thinking
how weird i am to watch movie and laughing by myself!!
RANDOM max.


Jun 18! with jee, wxy, marc, bryan. the gamers.. HAA
and we had dinner at this really nice cute korean restaurant
will go again if have the chance!!

and i went to watch another movie : xmen on Jun19!! LOL!
sudden decision with chin and marc. haha.

now, end of june month~

21st birthday celebration for SIM XING YI.

laughed a lot and really hard that day!
i missed secondary school times~
and grp photo is wif moni!! AHHH

FREAK4 meetup at AMK cos i went for my boss' baby full month celebration!
i think its like the second time i officially went there LOL!!


wonder how i rmb all the dates?
thanks to our frequent fb check ins and updates. LOL

but i think im still missing out lots of stuffs.
CANT RMB! its the pictures that's helping me.
alright more updates coming in.

stay tuned~

Labels: DBT23, SDZ, super duper happy, thoughts

9:56 PM - 0 comments

Saturday, January 01, 2011

bye bye 2010

hello blog.

another year gone~
its been 6-7 years since i started blogging??
haha, ill laugh reading the old posts.
and reflect how much i've grown.

so what have i did in 2010?
pretty lots of things. and changes too.

went thru year 3. FYP.
and finally graduation.
then became a lost cat.
not knowing what to do next.
but well, at least im working now.

several events that happened?
cant rmb much, but i know i had all my best moments
wif my DBT gang.

every moment with them is LOVE.
school+fyp+class+exams.
random outings.
nonsense dance practices.
annual dinner and dance.
phuket and many moree..

i am still dancing and im glad.
my juniors give me strength lol.
there are times when i feel that
i cant be of any help to them.
but i jux love their companyy.

and my dear sisteers.
havent forget u all at all.
its true we rarely meet.
only on birthday celebrations.
but u guys are always wif mi.

and i realised nowadays.
i tend to do things as and how i like it.
im less considerate noww i think LOL

i learned to reject certain things.
when i dont feel like doing.
unlike last time, people say, i jux do LOL

i talk lesser.
and only talk to people whom i feel comfortable.
when im uncomfortable, ill just blank out.
hahaha weirdo heh.

1.1.11 nice date.
and i dont know if i should look forward to 11.11.11
the day ill be 21 ..

still long, ive just turned 20 like 2 months ago only. hahaha.

alrite. resolutions for 2011?
dont know.

i need to maintain my weight! LOL

my life is turning boring.
im kind of starting to be like those working adults.
work sleep eat work sleep eat.
well at least i still have dance, for now..

start to feel that playing is not fun.
everyday jus feel lazy HAHAA
ohmy. need to change that.

so longggg.
ill be back~

haha anyway i jux saw this nice collaboration wif miss A and 2pm.

i like. LOL

Labels: randomies, rants, thoughts

11:37 PM - 0 comments

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

when i'm bored, theres nth for me to do.
ill jut find myself browsing thru my dbt photos.
there were like dunno how many thousands
but somehow, i dont get sick of viewing each n every photo.

when i look at those photos,
ill try to recall those scenes,
the words we said, the things we did.
i'm surprised how i can remember it so clearly.
smiling to myself.

then ill start listening to all those songs.
u noe i noe we noe. lol

let alone the videos haha.

dont know why ill just find myself spending hours just doing that.
LOL

i've seen lots of people saying they miss poly life,
but im gonna say,
I MISS MY CLASS
they do play the biggest part in my poly life.

ill never want all of these memories
to be kept and locked at one corner of my heart.
i wanna re-live it LOL

reminded of our class song, thank god i found you.
"ill go thru it all over again, to be able to feel this way"

okay must be crazy.
but.. you know. lol

and i really have no idea what should i do now.

- i still wanna dance.
_____________________________

okay sidetrack a little.
the only thing thats keeping me going currently,
is the drama - playful kiss!

i want all the episodes to be out now!
but yet i dont wan it to end.

ahh so contradicting.

Labels: misses, randomies, thoughts

11:02 PM - 0 comments

Sunday, April 04, 2010

hi blog.

bored so im here.
actually i haf some tings to blog.
but i dun RMB. lol

so,
haha.
im hungry.
cooking maggie.

oh yea,
had dance trainin on sat and there's junior showcase.
ommggg not bad can, i like it.
most imptly, ryan is happy.
and i bet everyone is =D

good job juniors!

i realised i wasnt really exposed to this kind of stuffs
when i first entered. awww ENVY HAHAH.

everyone's improvin fast.
GOOD.

a pity i've graduated,
will miss all the commitments.
even tho i always end up ranting abt it n all.
haha thats life.

alrite. so,
i miss my class.

lookin forward to monday outing, fri bbq
AND OF COS.

our graduation TRIP! =D

Labels: =), dance, randomies, SDZ, thoughts

1:17 AM - 0 comments

Friday, September 12, 2008

yep, i love sdz.

aye aye.
arms still hurting.
its kinda makin mi feel sick.
but nevertheless. went dance still.
everyone's got arm muscle pains too.
but aww. i tink im the onli one hus hand cant touch face lar?
maybe i did some different pushup from them.
or i used the wrong method or muscle!?

anyways. dance was LOL today.
pearl got her old old cha cha songs. LOL
n the wat marcaroni.. said by kendy. i duno the actual too.
many photos n videos taken. lol lol lol
all below~

the hilarious pearl..


candid shots

modern dancers hard at "work"

yea tts us. wifout KENDY.

these are videos actually..LOL!!
yep all thanks to kendy, the photographer of the day! =)
when u gain sth. u lose sth.
well, i don't tink im gaining anyting..
so why am i losing things?

Labels: =), dance, LOL, pixx, SDZ, thoughts

12:48 AM - 0 comments

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

holidays hoildays.
seems like dancidays.
mon - modern dance but ryan din come =(
tue - dance meetingg loll.
wed - last min performance @ amphitheatre.

haha. actually theres one more on tml too.
but but but.. not goin =x
guilty tho. but cant help it.
so SORRY my dancers.

fri - cc dance.
sat - modern dance.

so many things i wanna do leh.
i tink i wan to learn driving. daddy is greatly supporting mi. LOL.
i wan to read finish my hp book. im slow.
i wan to watch dramas n more dramas.
i wan to tidy my room once again.
i wan.. ok currently i forget wat else i wan.

but currently i tied down wif..
sch dance. waves13 comin
cc dance. performance comin
moni's filmin. lol. is there any other?
losin track. tts y listin them down here.

oh btw i realised 恶作剧2吻 is actually nice too.
was borin at the front. but behind part was interestin.
end up im watchin 恶作剧之吻. again.

im feelin .. dunno wat. i cant figure out.
oh well, all will be fine after one nite's slp xD

Labels: dance, randomies, thoughts

11:23 PM - 0 comments

Sunday, August 24, 2008

4:03 PM - 0 comments

Saturday, August 16, 2008

aiya. v sian.
i should be studyin.
lol but i forgot i got a performance later.
sumore haven practice de sia.?
so later go teacher's hse.
do the formations n we're up.
lol dun even noe whr n when's the performance.

sigh. shes always like tt.
_________________________________

okay so now no mood to study alr.
anyways few days ago. had a nice chat on msn.
haha. its good to still kip in contact.
chat abt many other stuffs too.
no doubt it brightened up my day xD
thanks kor.

remember the good times, forget the bad ones..

Labels: randomies, thoughts

1:40 PM - 0 comments

Sunday, July 06, 2008

was reading thru my achives,
saw a mini survey/quiz?
tt i did last yr..

SEVEN things i am afraid of:
1. losing DBT`03
2. losing a close fren
3. insects
4. being left out
5. gettin into big big trouble?
6. situations when things doesnt go right
7. gettin scolded or being shouted at

tts jux part of the quiz.
lol. n the first 2 happened..

the weather was hot n sunny jux now.
all of a sudden, rain jux came splashin down.
wif the sun still up there shining.
n within 30 secs. thunder came..
and now, the weather is sunny again.
so unpredictable huh.

tts how life is too i guess,
you will never know.
lol

but think again,
yea im still fortunate than many xD

now, can anyone tell mi is there any hw to do?
im so noob. lol

Labels: randomies, thoughts

3:56 PM - 0 comments

Friday, July 04, 2008

3:27 PM - 0 comments

Monday, June 16, 2008

maybe cause i've been home these few days.
got the time to think thru some things.

take me to far away
way to your secret place
take my tears my fears
take all my pain away

hmmm. i miss that class a lot.
i'm glad we took lots of pictures.
at least something ..
but it still hurts to think how
we ended up like this.

fate brought us together,
but it is also cruel to haf us separated jux like tt
wifout any warnin.

i miss those days when i always look forward to sch
wif a smile, no matter how tired or
how much stress i was undergoin tt timee
i had my most unglam times wif u all.
but i also had my happiest times wif u all as well.

i want that class blog back badly..
why mux it be removed. again wifout warnin.
it feels like heaven is keen on sepearatin us like tt.
even if i were to create a new class blog,
there's no meanin in it cos its not the same anymore..
the daily posts, be it happy or sad. ALL GONE.

sorry. lol.
it jux happened cos i saw marc's blog wif those pics.
n i happened to be listenin to songs we used in class blog b4.
lolll.

Labels: =(, thoughts

3:02 AM - 0 comments

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

sometimes some things jux cant help it..

but yea.
STOP worrying.
STOP complaining.
and START doing.....

helpp.

Labels: =(, randomies, thoughts

11:34 PM - 0 comments

Saturday, May 24, 2008

life jux goes on.
nv goin to stop.

Labels: thoughts

8:25 PM - 0 comments

Friday, April 11, 2008

cls fo camp gatherin at sentosa.
went there late wif jeee chin bryan.


loll taken on the tram's mirror.

den reached siloso beach.
dun reali rmb details..
jux play play play there lo.

n took pics wif the wet GMs.

after tt wanted to go home early eat mummy's dinner.
haven been home for dinner dunno how long le.
its always mornin go out. nearly midnite reach home.
but aiya she say she nv cook. den ask mi outside eat.
and so. the whole gang went vivo.
mi n jee went mac. while most carls jr and some food court.
den went up to the top lvl the open area eat tgt.
loll after eatin. we jux lie down look at the black sky.


tt felt so nicee. shd do tt again some dayyy

i just realised i am a horrible selfish friend
i cause unhapiness to everyone around me.
so people out there, please don't make friends with me =)

Labels: =), CLS, DBT03, T.T, thoughts

11:59 AM - 0 comments

Monday, March 31, 2008

did a fun n crazy ting wif my dbt peeps today.
anyways. SHERMAIN SOH YI HUL is back!
and so the 10 of us [squad9+shermin] went causeway point.
except jee went home. she's sick x(
and the 9 of us went dinner at PM.
den guess wat!?

we went to the entrance of CWP.
said bye bye to each other first.
den 1, 2, 3..
we BILIBANJA-ED there!!!!
and right after tt.
mi xp shermin teddy chin marc jack chiong-ed to mrt.
while kelly n bryan chiong-ed to bus int.
hahahaha!

I LOVE MY DBT GANG.

hmmm alrite anyways.
a whole gang of the class met up todayy.
went to find the teacher in charge. mrs mark.
n yea. we got our reasons y we got seperated.
due to overcrowding blah blah. ya. zzzz man.
its saddening saddeningg saddddeeennnninnng.

we don't have a choice.
it's fate tt DBT03 has to split..
and into 2 different stgs sumore! =(

yes. luckily. she was kind enough.
to say tt we could do individual swoppin.
between our class so tt we can be wif our cliques.
yes tt gave us some hope.

BUT BUT BUT..
the whole class is considered one whole clique ya!?
its possible to seperate..
except tt some will be unhappy wif the arrangements.
we were jux so afraid to hurt one another in the class.
nor do we wan to cause any internal conflict between us.
and so. we got ourselves into this mess.
dunno to remain as it is or wat..

i dunno wat to do too.
we are left wif tml to decide.
SIGHHHHHH.

Labels: =(, =), DBT03, LOL, T.T, thoughts

10:03 PM - 0 comments

Saturday, March 29, 2008

5:55 PM - 0 comments

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

aww. i dun wanna be little miss busy anymore.
i dun wanna do anyting, dun feel like doin anyting.

haaa. but no matter wat.
i din regret i chose FO camp over dance for now.
sumhow. i feel tt tts whr my heart shd be at.
whr i feeel the most secure and safe. relaxed and comfy.
a place whr i feel the real mi. and not sumone else.
thank you my dbt peeps.
ty xp mama. ty jeeeeee.
u 2 take care ar ><
whrs my kelly nu`er tooo.
and i miss shermain soh yi hul siaa. LOL.
<3ss!

Labels: DBT03, randomies, rants, thoughts

10:53 PM - 0 comments

Saturday, March 08, 2008

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh had a long long day ytd.
mornin jiu wake. reach chinatown at 815am.
eat le. den went to the dance theatre.
practice practice. combine wif china dancers. lalala.
had few rehearsals b4 the real one at nite.
like tt lo. act haf quite lots of fun.
heeeeeeeeee. but im lazy to update everyting le.
aiya no photos to update. cos i forget brg cam!!
unless my frens send mi the pics. hahahaha
yaa okayy everyting ends at around 1030.
den went home lorr. so tiredddy.

today oso. in my opinion. even more eventful than ytd sia.
even tho its jux performance iin bukit batok.
one is at bb east cc. another bbcc lo.
den at bb east cc perform 1 item wif china pp.
bbcc is our own 2 items.
end up lol siaa.

we prepare hao le. at bb east perform first. 8 pm.
performed one dance. prepare go bbcc le.
suddenly still say wan us come back perform last item.
okaay. we jiu faster change change change.
den 10 pp squeeze in car go bbcc. cool ar.
den at bbcc. perform 2 items. chopchop.
den oso rush rush go back bb east.
on the way there. suddenly teacher tell us
to perform our 2 bbcc de items oso at bb east.
wahlao. we change dao siao. there public sia
unglam daooooooo. OH MY. no face siaaa =.=
shitty man. den rush rush rush. lolllllll.
i felt like im havin shower tt time alr. whole face like cryin. LOL
hahaha. but kinda fun la. run here n there.
den i almost left my specs at bbcc siaa.
so messy man. hahahaa.

den after the dance ended at 930. at bb east.
cool leh. teacher treat us eat. hahaha.
den i dunno wif some famous pp? some minister or watever.
cos we there still got china come de dancers ma.
HOHO. den tt kopitiam tt i went b4 eat de hor.
wahlao the people treat us SO well la.
ask us still need wat. can reach the food anot. need help ma.
as if we in restaurant leh. mind u tt is normal KOPITIAM.
sth like ur block downstars de coffee shop tt kind lor.
haha i guess they tot we are china dancers too.
treat us so well man. ahh singaporeans.
but nvm. i enjoy tt. HAHAHAHA =x

okay sian. tml still got performance at yuhua cc.
im goin crazy. ZZZZ sia. OHMY.
den many pp cant make it. some oso dowan go..
act i dun wan go oso de. SO TIRED. but end up like no pp leh.
aiya den i pity teacher la. so i say i perform lo.
den end up get 4 pp onli. HOHO. zz man.
ahh. okay shall stop here.
haven bathe.. awww
I'M SO LAZY CAN! lol.

to somebody;
please. don't anyhow blame ur gf's friends
if there's prob in u two's relationship.
by rite it should be mostly both side's fault.
not the friends okay. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
i hate pp who accuse mi of sth i din do
esp saying mi affecting ur gf's opinion and affectin ur relationship.?
i'm not even allowing u to suspect mi of it.
cos i din! wan mi to repeat? I DIN OKAY.
besides. i'm oso too busy to be doing tt alrite.
if u don't know me well, don't anyhow say me. ty.
i alr don't care if u indirectly said i'm immature or watever.
but pls don't pick a fight wif ur gf anymore since u two are fine now.
yes and pls don't affect our friendship. well i noe it wont be affected.
aiya. u are so stupid. use ur brain la! so no brain.
stupid stupid stupid stupid.
this is so upsetting. ZZZZ.

Labels: =), dance, thoughts

11:32 PM - 0 comments